Saturday, December 29, 2007

Just words and my new mate

I’m mega pissed off! My computer broken down on Christmas Eve. So i can't post any of the designs i've been working on, not that there's much to post anyway, been working loads during the chrimbo period. i just read through some of the older posts on my blog... and they seem to be full of empty, unfulfilled promises. I’m sorry (for those of you who care

I’m gonna post my character biography in a lame attemped to keep my blog updated.

So with out further-ado let me introduce Theodore Prince Boxman

Theodore Prince Boxman

Age: 26

Hobbies: Collecting random and useless things from eBay (most notably his extensive collection of annuals from his favorite movie and TV shows from the 1980’s, McDonalds happy meal toys, a variety of different hats and head wear, his favorites being “starter snap backs” and “winter trooper caps” )
Not going out.
Reading comics, and children’s books
Watching DVD’s and old video’s
Looking behind the sofa to find things he’d forgotten were lost.
Dressing up.

EBay obsession:
Most expensive items purchased on eBay:
1. replica Robocop suit
2. replica Ghostbusters proton pack
3. A signed Timmy mallet mallet, which was featured on episode 52 of “Wacaday”. (it turned out to be a fake)
4. Replica Spiderman suit.
5. R-3250 Ultra-Compact Gen1 night vision Goggles

Least expensive items purchased on eBay:
1. The “Telebugs” (80’s kids’ cartoon) kitchen Magnet for 12p
2. “Natwest piggybank” bottom plug (the rubber plug part that keeps the money in. needed to complete his set of “natwest piggybanks”) 37p
3. Lot of PEZ dispensers including: Garfield the Cat, X-Men's Wolverine, Fred Flintstone, Looney Toons's Yosamiti Sam, TMNT's Michelangelo, Peanut's Woodstock, and the PEZ Clown. 48p
4. 90’s fanta promotion yo-yo (to add to the set, still on the look out for the super rare gold coke yo-yo) 98p
5. Sealed box of batman returns stickers: 1 pound 37p (the one you used to get in individual packets. Bought because of an argument in a local corner shop over the price of the stickers in 1992. It ended in Theodore getting laughed at and being told that “you can’t find them cheaper any where else”. Theodore now remarks “Who’s laughing now Mr Patel, you old cunt!”)

Feedback: 3568: 99.9 % positive (received one negative feedback due to a nasty feud over a “wideAwake club” annual.)



Favourite flavour crisps: cheese and onion
Favourite food: a popcorn salami and crisp sandwich.


Likes and Dislikes

Likes: picking scabs, Chevy Chase films, the feeling of your ball bags when they get cold and turn hard and shell like, resembling a kind of warm walnut, Nutella, getting shinnies in packs of stickers, the smell of Vicks Vaporub,

Dislikes: the taste of orange juice after you’ve brushed your teeth, going out, most people, his name and jelly


Favourite website:
eBay.com
Tesco.com
Youtube.com
Youporn.com
4oD (which is more of a downloadable webpage programme thingy)
alluc.org
stage6.divx.com/

Favourite TV shows (including past and present)
Peep show
Bottom
WacAday
Telebugs
proSTARS
Young ones
might boosh
Thundercats
Fun house
Are you afraid of the dark?
Clarissa Explains It All
Euro trash
Rugrats
Blossom
Saved by the bell
Friends
You bet
Big break
Beavis and butthead
Rainbow
Crystal maze
Ren and stimpy
Jeremy Kyle (favorite episode David vs. Debbie, here’s the link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dw3zxL-yahU&feature=related)


Character biography

Theodore prince Boxman (born 7th June 1981). He was named after the 26th American president and explorer, Theodore Roosevelt, and his parent’s favorite musician, Prince. Theodore was actually conceived at one of Prince’s early gigs at First Avenue, in Minneapolis, Minnesota, which is his parent’s home town. Shortly before Theodore was born his parents Marty and Jennifer Boxman moved to London to head the marine department at London zoo. They settled in Paddington.

Sadly in the summer of 1999 both his parents were killed whilst testing a new shark repellent. Theodore watched as his parent’s successfully repelled two great white sharks, unfortunately the repellent attracted giant jelly fish (a problem that was later ironed out) that stung his parents to death. Theodore now makes a small fortune from his parent’s invention, but hates to go out in wide open spaces, local swimming pools and refuses to eat jelly.

When Theodore was a young child the other kids were constantly making fun of his name. At the time when he was growing up he shared his name with a three inch talking chipmunk with a funny voice. The constant name teasing was the reason enough for Theodore changed his name to Prince, however, the numerous references to a short weirdly dressed Androgynous man in cuban heels lead to even more name teasing. He then changed it to his first initials: T.P, and that worked for a while until the “T.P for my bum hole” episode of Beavis and butthead aired on channel 4 in the 90’s. His peers soon realized that the initials stood for toilet paper and it was back to the constant piss taking. so he change it back to Theodore again. Because of this weird history of name changing, Theodore now has a strong dislike to Prince and his music; Prince William and Harry (but mainly because they’re sloaney socialite dicks); and Alvin and the chipmunks.

In fact Theodore doesn’t like any music unless it has reference to a movie or TV show, and links most of his daily activities to movie soundtracks. I.e. he always listens to “Flight of the Valkyries” from Apocalypse Now while he’s pooing, and if it’s been an emotional bog roll clenching, all clothes off (including watches),bum stinging, sweaty battle poo, he’ll play 'It's Over' ('Good-Bye') from ‘terminator 2 judgment day’ sound track whilst flushing.

Since his parents have died, Theodore stop going out and purchases all his shopping from tesco.com, or he calls out for takeaway food. As a result most of his friends with in the first year gave up on trying getting him out, and he now only has a couple of close friends who go around his two bedroom flat and visit him from time to time. The only time Theodore leaves his flat is to visit his parent’s graves, but only in full Robocop attire (he’s recently been persuaded to keep it to a 3 piece minimum, foot wear, upper body armor and helmet)

14 comments:

Maarten Rijs said...

if you didnt wanna be an animator youd probably have ended up as a writer. wow. seriously this is good. how do you make up shit like this!
dont tell me the sweaty battle poo and the nut bag part were inspired by own experience lol.
loved how his parents are killed by jellyfish while testing a shark repellent haha.

is your computer working again?

I watched spirited away. whoah! i dont wanna make this comment super long so il email you my thoughts.

talk to you soon.

Maarten Rijs said...

"shit like this" was meant positive lol.

messytimbo said...

Thanks mate. But I don't think i could be a writer, my spelling and Grammar are shit! i've already update this post 2 times coz i keep finding typo's. but i've had loads of fun writing this.

i'm thinking of writing a whole story base around this character. i've just had loads of thoughts and ideas that i think i could communicate through this character in a entertaining way.

yep the battle poo and walnut parts are taken from what I’ve said during funny conversation i've had with my friends about poo, pooing and general mans bits. i did a poo today and remarked to my colleagues that 'it was a bum stinger' I thought it was funny so I’ve added that in my post as well.

My comp isn't working yet, i don't know when I’ll have it fixed.

Glad you like the film and I looking forward to hearing your thoughts

libra bear said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
libra bear said...

Is there a lot of you in this character, I just watched that Jeremy Kyle episode, I was pissin myself, is there more..... I definately like the way you approach your stories, "thats my opinion and I'm going to stic with it" Have a good new year bro....

Shouren Ho 何守任 said...

Reading your post reminds me Joker's Graduation day in Full Metal Jacket. Though there are some typo, it's interesting.(Although I didn't catch some of it due to different culture&habits lol)

Meredith said...

I think I'm becoming a Timbo addict... Wasn't it "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"

messytimbo said...

Meredith: your totally right! I feel shame for making such a mistake. I'm gonna change it now!
Shouren: yeah I thought there was gonna be some stuff that people wouldn't get due to different cultures. But I thought it would be a good chance for people to learn about a different time and a place.. I feel it gives more texture when reading. That's what I found when I was reading american psycho.

Wes: I think it's hard not to put my self in this character. But I don't think the character is me. I think he is quite a lot different. But that is my favourite jeremy kyle episode :)

Maarten Rijs said...

whoah dude that was fast hahaha. I was still editing some typos out of my post.
i hope you had great holidays. Im gonna email you now.

johanna said...

hey tim just tried to email you but it bounced. email me on johannalundberg@gmail.com

xx

The Hornet said...

i deleted it because i actually did not add him. i was trying it out but it never went to his page. i don't know how too add nobody, you can teach me that soon. i will post 2 sundays until i start getting recognised. nut yeah man i'll see you soon.

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